Rejection

I'm thinking about how "rejection" works in my life and others' lives. When I say rejection I mean something internal that happens when you feel that you've been rejected by another person or when you reject someone else: I'd call either one of those a way "rejection" works in our lives.

Yesterday, I saw 2 instances of rejection at work: me feeling rejected by someone and then, later, someone else feeling rejected by me. So -- I guess you could say "rejection" was hanging around me yesterday. (Ironically, if you checked out my Facebook status from yesterday afternoon, it would say "Alli really wishes she were with her friends right now"). So I find it fascinating that a spirit of rejection would be at work on me when I most wanted to be in community with others.

The instance when I felt rejected, I felt really stupid. And then I felt self-blame; like I never should have reached out to them to begin with -- like it was my fault, as though I had done something wrong by trying to engage. I felt naive and ridiculous to think I'd have been received. I wanted to agree I'd never reach out to them again. I felt tempted to completely write off this relationship at that very moment. Yes - that's dramatic...I'm just telling you what went through my head. I think on some level I was tempted to make those agreements just to make myself feel better. I'll just run away and hide. And maybe we just won't be friends anymore so I don't ever have to face the fact that you rejected me.

The instance when someone felt rejected by me, I was totally surprised! I had no idea that was happening and it really made me realize how ignorant I can be to the spiritual things going on around me. I think the spirit of rejection working around me that day found my friend's soft spot of (past) rejection and thought "hey - this is good: i'll just push these 2 people further apart." Luckily, my friend was honest enough to speak it out. Rejection lies to us about someone else's motives... "they're doing that because they don't like you or they don't want to be with you."

Anytime we speak out what we see happening in the spiritual realm (good or bad), we create things that weren't there before. When my friend spoke out loud about rejection, it probably took root somewhere in my spirit and resonated. And today I've realized - hey rejection was just ON me yesterday. That's not my fault but I sure can do something about it.

So here you go, spirit of rejection:
Father - I repent of welcoming and partnering with a spirit of rejection. I take responsibility for entertaining and giving value to the thoughts that rejection put in my head. I don't know what makes me vulnerable to rejection, but I ask you to free me from it. In the name of Jesus, I renounce any agreements I made about my friendships or relationships under the influence of rejection. I know I am received by you and therefore, I am received fully. I know that because of that, I am free to engage in all my friendships without the burden of trying to gain approval and acceptance from them. Because I have it from you. Thanks for that.